As a mom/lifestyle blogger, I often get asked personal questions as people assume I am an open book. I don’t always want to share things that are super personal, but I feel like this is the right time to answer a question I get asked all the time – if I plan to have any more kids.
First, before I answer the question, let me just say that I truly believe this is a personal decision for every mom. We all have our own reasons for wanting more kids or not. But, we should also be careful about bombarding moms with personal questions that may make them uncomfortable such as “Are you going to try for a third so you can have a boy?” Really – it is no one’s business but your own.
However, since I have put myself out there and am confident in my choices, I am willing to answer this question: The answer is NO. No, I do not plan on having any more children, and I have my reasons why. Whether you agree with my reasons or not, that’s okay. We are each entitled to my opinion, but please, let’s remember to be kind to one another.
The Reasons I am Fine with Just Two
1. It’s too expensive.
Raising kids is crazy expensive! According to Time, “For a middle-income family to raise a child born in 2015 through the age of 17, the cost of rearing a child has hit $233,610.” That’s just ONE kid. When you factor in the cost of living (especially for New York families), that number is even higher. Child care, clothes, food, and the basics already cost a fortune, but then you have to factor in saving for college tuition. I’m already looking at the cost of half a million to raise my two precious girls easily. Yikes!
2. Finding a work/life balance is hard enough already.
I strongly believe in maintaining a healthy work/life balance. As a mom who works full time and blogs full time with a husband who works full time, we have to prioritize our time to maintain our sanity. Our lives are already so busy with work and activities for our two girls that I cannot imagine squeezing in more time to take care of another kid.
3. I want more leisure time – not less.
Let’s face it – when we become parents, our leisure time drastically dwindles. Where we once were able to jet off and travel, it is much more complicated to do things like that when you have kids. Traveling with kids is tough! We still do it, but we are looking forward to the days when our girls are older and traveling is easier. If we have another child, we will have even less leisure time and longer to wait before we can return to having some of the adventures we had before.
4. We are not getting any younger.
While a lady never reveals her age, let’s just say I feel too old to have another kid. Even though more and more women are getting pregnant and having babies later in life, doctors label you a geriatric pregnancy if you are 35 or older. This is because once you hit that birthday, there are more risks.
5. We have no empty space.
Our 3 bedroom/3 bath house is just the right size for us. Actually, the house is perfect for a house of women – I get my own bathroom, and so does each girl. Lol! But, seriously, we don’t have any extra space for another kid. We already fill up our space, so we would have to move to a larger house if we had another kid.
6. I *hate* being pregnant.
I know some women absolutely love being pregnant, but I was not one of them. I hated being pregnant. With both girls, I had the worst morning sickness, and I’d really rather not go through that again. Sorry, not sorry for speaking my truth.
7. The world isn’t always a nice place.
Have you watched the news lately? The world is a scary place. I am already anxious about raising my daughters in this world, so I have a hard time thinking about bringing another child into this place. I know there is more good than bad, but it still scares me sometimes to think about what the world will look like in the future for my daughters.
8. We are happy and healthy.
Most importantly, I am happy with two happy and healthy girls. Sure, I miss the days when my girls were babies, but that doesn’t mean I feel the need to do it all over again. I love watching my daughters grow and enter new seasons of life. And, I can get my baby fix by cuddling my friends’ and families’ babies.